Society's Dictates--Young Love

     There have been an awful lot of posts on various blogs and articles posted about what kinds of romantic relationships we should be developing as a society, when we should be getting married, and why not to get married so young. I should point out that "so young" is usually early twenties. While they're all interesting, they point to a society able to dictate  kind of lives we lead--you should be married with three kids before you're thirty; you shouldn't even think about getting engaged until you're thirty-one; you should have a relationship that makes you fight to find things in common because you're such different people and opposites attract; you should do this; you should do that. Personally, I don't care who you fall in love with, or marry, so long as you treat your partner with respect and don't go showing disrespect to me and my decisions because of the life I choose to lead.
     My younger sister and her boyfriend got engaged at the beginning of the year and this dictatorial society we've developed became a huge problem in my life because of her decision--she had friends and random people telling her she was making a huge mistake because they got engaged when they're only twenty-one. If they are going to make the commitment to each other, why not? What do you, as a single, twenty-two-year-old college student have to show this young woman that is any different than what she's learned from her single older sister, her friends who've gotten married and had kids, her parents, her cousins, aunts and uncles, and the people both married and divorced in her life? Why does society allow us to crush the dreams of young women who do want to get married and have a family?
     The answers I've received to these questions have all been that Feminism tells us she should be focusing on herself as a woman and not giving her life over to a man, depending on him. When did Feminism become so warped?! Feminism is about women being able to make the choice to either become career-women, become mothers, stay single without being criticized, or choose to live a life of serial monogamy. It isn't about destroying the traditional family values, it is about giving women the choice to be what they want.
     Another line I've gotten says getting married so young and committing to a single person will cause problems down the line because they'll grow apart. They still need to grow and develop. I was watching a show on television and the female character put it perfectly: marriage is about finding a person that will grow with you.
     While these opinions are wonderful, and I'm glad there are people who hold the views, what gives society the right to crush the hope of young people when life isn't cynical enough to keep us within other people's opinions? In recent history people would say something when a friend was making a leap without foundation, but for a stranger to tell you you're too young to marry is overstepping their place.
     Why can't we be happy someone has found joy in love?

Just a thought...
Stephie

Valentine's Day 2014

     This year I'm celebrating Valentine's day a little differently--spending the day with my dogs. It isn't all that much different than my usual relaxing night at home with a book, but this year my family went above and beyond.
     You see, I'm house-sitting for my parents and they left something behind for me. The dogs didn't get the awesome-ness of the family, but they're not allowed to have any chocolate. It looks like this year I get not one, but four valentines; it's a great improvement!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Stephie